I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
