I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize