he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize