my mouth tastes like poor choices
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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