If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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