That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize