I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Randomize
