yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
