your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
