I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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