it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Randomize
