yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
