playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
