dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Randomize
