Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
