maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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