I hate all girls vehemently.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
