Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
