I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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