She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
you inspire me to be a worse person
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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