she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
