went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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