Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
