I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
