She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
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