I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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