dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
