so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
