Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I think people are normalizing furries
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize