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I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Randomize