your thong is hanging out like whoa
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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