handjob tips. give me some.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
All the doctor said was why
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize