i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
