Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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