I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
