So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Randomize
