He is an equal opportunity slut.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
