Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I supernannyed him into submission
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
