Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Randomize
