i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
