So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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