Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
