i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
