he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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