I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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