You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize