my mouth tastes like poor choices
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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