ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
