Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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