I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize