I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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