hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
