I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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