why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
